. . moving on.

It makes me so sad that I wasn’t his longest relationship. He always went back to his ex girlfriend, yet she cheated, she did him so dirty… she’s nothing but a slut ! & he always took her back.. I wasn’t the best at relationships, but I loved him, I did nothing but love him, I never cheated, I never intended to do anything to hurt him. I was jealous, I was kinda over protective, BUT I did it out of love, I always loved him so much, but it just wasn’t enough. He wanted me to be his perfect little not so jealous girlfriend, whatever. I did my part, I loved him as much as I could. . I waited for him for a year & 4 months, It’s been 4 months since our last kiss. . we haven’t been together for so long, I haven’t heard him tell me he’s loved me in over a year, yet my dumbass says it all the fucken time, I’m so broken, I feel like an idiot, but it’s over. I finally learned that enough is enough, & I deserve to  be happy. I might have a child from him, but I’m okay. I’m smiling, and I’m ready to love again. Whoever is willing to accept my past and love me for me, I just want to feel loved again, it’s been too long. But I just want to feel special. I really want to just move forward with my life, it’s time.